Please find Resume.PDF attached
Posted May 2nd, 2008 by Isobelle
Is it me, or does it seem a little silly that getting into a guild requires
writing an essay discussing your strengths and weaknesses as a raider? The game
itself already hinges on being a second job as it is; doesn't forcing people to
jump through hoops to play together just seem counter productive to, oh-I-don't-know,
having "fun"? This is a fucking video game we're talking about. Again, maybe it's
just me, but I'm pretty sure I've never asked for a list of references before
letting someone choose to be on the "red" team with me in Mario Kart co-op mode.
As noted in my last column, I recently decided to take the plunge on free server transfers, completely forgetting the fact that I'd find myself back in "Please Let Me Raid With You Guys I'm Good I Swear Town USA". I even had a few people I had been guilded with before on the new server that I sent a few tells to, and they would be like "oh, I dunno, I'll discuss it with our GM and see if I can get you into vent to have a talk with him". Gee, should I tuck my shirt in beforehand? Hold on, tell him to wait, I better shave first.
So here I am on Dreadmaul, writing these stupid applications on random scrub guild's forum pages. I have to register, click the stupid link in my email, then go back and fill out their silly little form. Do they have HR people who scan these? On a whim, I made one yesterday just being overtly silly about how retarded the whole process was, and I got some dry response about how they take the time out of their day to read my application, and how I should at least put some time into making is look nice.
This is their honest to god response, not photoshopped. I put reasons #1 & 2 on why they should accept me in their guild as "I don't have AIDS" and "I'm not retarded". They since went back and edited my own app to read "I am a dumb cunt" or something equally clever. This was their response. I couldn't make this shit up if i tried. By all means, APPLY to this guild. Their forums are a hoot.
Making it look nice? Are you fucking kidding? Hey fuckstick, I know where the sinister strike button is. This isn't a formal request for grant funding to continued cancer research we're discussing. I want to push the 'hurt' button over and over while standing behind the dragon. I would have been happier with a "WOW IS SRS BIZNESS OK" response. This guild apparently raids in dead silence, for fear of having DKP docked if (god forbid!) they cut the cheese on vent.
So instead I'm standing around in Shattrath with my thumb up my ass spaming a "/2 Full combat rogue / prot tank / resto druid looking for a guild that doesn't require me to write a fucking poem about how awesome I am on their stupid forums. Fully exalted on three toons in Kara, I intend to never be saved there again. Just fucking ginvite me, and if I suck, gboot me later" macro.
Is it asking too much to take up a precious slot on your VIDEO GAME TEAM roster? Last time I checked, this server was new, and there are exactly ZERO guilds who have hit the maximum guild size of 500. God forbid I happen to be jerking off in Shattrath and you need a tank, rogue, OR druid for a run. And seriously, if I suck, just kick me out and be done with it, but let's not pretend this is some elite group of combat hardened guerilla mercenaries you have here. It's fucking WoW, not rocket surgery. I love how guilds go from "new guild LFM, anyone over 60 accepted, PST for ginvite" to "yeah, well... we killed Gruul last night, so it looks like we're gonna have to cut the chaff and really knuckle down on dead weight around here". Or the other one I love: "well, we might have room for your druid, because he's a healer, but we're full on rogues and tanks, sorry". Oh, don't apologize to me! Apologize to the manager at Pizza Hut tomorrow when you show up late for your delivery job because you were up all night wiping to Hydross. Good luck with that, Mr. All Powerful Internet Middle Management.
Fucking ridiculous.
Srsly. I hate this fucking game.
/agree
Christ, how complicated can you really make out your skills to be :P
lol, just looked at the Template...This guild askes allot of pointless questions:P
"What guilds have you been in Previously?" Is that any of there business?
"Why did you leave" Same as before, none of there business
"What roles have you played in a raid" Well if your a Mage your a nuker, if your a Priest your a healer....Wouldnt answering your class tell you that sure certain skill tree's make a difference but not enough to completely change the role of your class.
"Do you have Ventrilo Installed?" Yes
"Do you have a working Mic?" No, Ventrilo is just a Status symbol
All they really have to know is your level and class, If they are a very hardcore naturally they will want to know your Gear because in the end thats all that makes you stronger on a MMO like WoW.
They need to clear the sand out of there Vagina.
I start to question the maturity level of some frontpage articles...Do you guys actually spend some time thinking WHY guilds asks all those questions?..
1 @ Belcameron
""Do you have Ventrilo Installed?" Yes
"Do you have a working Mic?" No, Ventrilo is just a Status symbol""
I know several people who have vent but not mic, they only there to listen to what to do.
Now to yours "Non of your business"
It is pretty much their business why you left your own guild. Since you want to join them, and raid with them, they must know what kind of guy you are, and why you left your last guild. Were you slicking, or did you ninja an epic and the /gquit.. Its like writing in CV to a job "None of your business where I worked before"..
Dont make me laugh anymore.. oh wait, I duno to laugh or to cry about your statements...
Now, to "What roles have you played in a raid"..
I must ask you, do you even play wow? Your words that a certain skill trees cant change your roll that much made me cry.. Did you got your char from EBAY.com?
Go check out class named paladin for example. They got three trees, protection, retri and holy.. if the names doesn't tells you enough, let me explain: ITS 3 DIFFERENT PLAYSTYLES!
Protection: You are tank, and focus at taking all the beating.
Holy: You are healer, keeping others up
Retri: You are DPS, damaging foes..
And you say none skill can change raid role that much? rofl...
(Btw, paladin was an exmaple, same goes for priests, warriors, druids, shaman...)
Please read up before starting to flame guild applications.. seriosly..
@Isobelle
Well, as much I can say some guilds ask to much, applications are an must. Let me explain my point of view:
When you want to join a hardcore raiding guild, they of course wants to know what kind of guy you are. An application can say really much.
You were totally right comparing WoW to second job. It is kind of. GM is your boss, guild is your work place.
Now, they dont want to incite random guys, and kick them next week, only because it showed out taht he were completely moron. Thats what applies are for, you show them that you are decent by writing some words, and describing your self as player, they see you might fit in guild and give you trial.
Much better, and looks better then inviting new ppl and kicking them out because they wont fit in each next day.
So your happy with working a job during your break?
Why is so many people on this game so anal about taking it sooo seriously?
I swear you hear one comment about your precious WoW and you run to it's defence like a fat kid runs to a choclate cake.
yeah, I have played the game admitting not as much as you probably have (which I am grateful for) I went from a Fire Mage to a Arcane Mage and the only difference was a few stats and spells but it was not like I went 'WTF how do I play now!' It was more like 'oh cool, I dont have Pyroblast anymore but I can do things like increase my intellect and armor rating etc'.
Thats right, I did not say classes dimwit so please sit down and listen when you are reading.
Heck and that is why even tho WoW has 6 million Subscriptions people dont not realise that even more millions of people AVOID the game because of the bad reputation it is getting and there is no denying it.
Now about Ventrilo, how many people honestly go on Vent without a Microphone? Because every Vent server I have been on I have never heard somebody go 'Excuse Ted over there, He has no mic'and what can Ted contribute to the server?
Yes it is not any of there Business why they left a old guild, Just like a Employer legally has no right to ask you about why you left your last job...They can ask the question sure, but not for one second do you have to answer because with all they know it was a very private matter.
'Why should we accept you' um well, is this the country club or something...do I have to be 'Blue blooded'I mean christ your a bunch of kids (mostly) playing a freaking game not Knights of the Garter on a questing to save the United Kingdom.
1) It's a game.
1b) 9 times out of ten, logging into ventrilo with these 'serious hardcore end game guilds', the first thing you're confronted with is dick jokes, or someone playing 'what what in the butt' from youtube into the mic.
1c) The maturity level of front page articles? Seriously?
1d) No, really. Seriously?
2) http://notaddicted.com/images/isobelle/karaserver1st.gif
2b) rofl
3) I was guildless from transferring servers. The old server sucked, and everyone jumped ship. I did too, but for some reason, the guild i happened to be in decided they'd rather play alone on an empty server. I've since hooked up with the top raiding horde guild on Dreadmaul. They weren't retards, and I didn't even have to apply. Bonus!
4) @Bladee: firefox has spellcheck in text entry fields. look into it. "seriosly".
4b) Your words that a certain skill trees cant change your roll that much made me cry.. Did you got your char from EBAY.com? Dude, don't cry. it's a huge turnoff for the chicks to see a man blubbering like a little girl, doubly so to find that talent trees SKILL TREES were the cause. Also, I really hope you don't take the time to hold down shift and capitalize "EBAY.com" when you visit it. URLs aren't case sensitive.
5) That is all.
1aa) Rly sherlock? Would never think that. I mean, all those pixels looks soo real.
1bb) Only because you had problems with good guilds, doesnt makes all bad. I dont judge all front page writes only because some of them made whine post after being declined to a guild, do I?
1bbc) OMG HE MISSPELLED!! English is my 5th language, so I really cba check each word for spelling in a such a serious debate as this one.
P.S. oh, and nice screen, clearly shows that guild have some skills to down outdoor bosses and almoust clear SSC
1ccb) No seriosly, this is serious talk.. I need serious cat pic.
4) Apparently URLs are case sensetive since you are writing them in caps.
You have to realize that even though you are a normal, functional, sometimes clever or funny member of society... WoW has 8 million players or whatever, and most of those are not. Some people are really, really shitty at a game that is not hard to be at least decent at. It's amazing. And if I planned on raiding 3 or more nights a week, I wouldn't want to waste my time scheduling my time on anything less than someone at least fairly dedicated.
I mean, I agree, it's generally pretty fuckin stupid... but still.. there's a valid reason behind it.
Then again, I quit playing WoW months ago because I don't want to schedule time to play it. AoC here I come.
@Bladee
Because it's impossible to lie in a app, right?
BTW, if the guy play a RESTO DRUID, I assume he played a healer.
The point is many time, app are asking stupid question anyone with 2 working brain cell can figure out the answer by themself.
Yes, he can be resto now, but was feral before. And? The best way to know if someone have skill and know his class spec is by trying the player. Get him in a "on farm" raid or in an heroic. If he suck, kick him.
In a previous guild (pre-BC), we were testing new applicant that way:
Get into Strat, and pull the 3-4 first group in 1 shot.
- if he survive, we continue.
- if he die and comment on how stupid it was, baibai.
- if he die but ask for a second try, welcome.
We avoided the slacker, the sucky and get those who want to beat a challenge that way.
Scared he's a ninja? You think he'll say in the App he left/got kick for that? You think he'll list this guild? How can you be sure he's not only listing the guild he have good rep with?
In my opinion, APP should be only asking for revelant info:
- character name
- class
- spec
- do you know your fcking role in raid?
You'll HAVE to meet him anyway before invite, so why not keep useless question for that moment?
If that's what you look for, check his armory.
If his gear is good enough for you, then fix an appointement and talk to the guy. Are you really going to dish out someone only because he don't have vent or no mic?
Another useless question. Vent take 2min to install and mic cost 10$. If he really want to raid, the applicant with manage to get them.
If you want to use an app to avoid idiot, ask technical question about his role. If he can't asnwer, you don't invite him.
Ex : "If you're a fury warrior, how much +hit your have and why you only have that much?" His answer will tell you much more about the player than any other stupid question we see in app in general.
Well, they didnt asked what role do you PLAY, but what role have you PLAYED as. That means that if you are for exmaple resto druid, and u will be needed for tanking, they wanna know if you played role as tank before, and have experince in it.
And that you say to not list a guild.. well, if he have been in server for a while, others will know it, and comment on it, ebcause I know that all officers of endgame guilds check other guilds apply forums time to time. So lie is detected easily.
But I agree with you on the rest, and that questions should be asked about his role and class questions.. My main point is that I dissagree with some statements that applications are bullshit and are not needed.
I think he meant bullshit APP like he saw aren't needed, and that what pissed him. I think if the app asked intelligent question, Izo would prolly not come back with that article, which was to make people realize how stupid smany app are. Most of them are only there to give the "impression" they are serious. I have friend who work as HR, and I showed him some app for fun and he asked with a serious face "who made that form? a kid?". But maybe that's a good thing. Serious player can avoid those guild just by reading their "application form".
Oh and what they did to deny Izo is rather dumb...
Duno, I kinda understand their Gm to decline an aplicant who says "I dont have aids" as for the reason they should invite him.. Retarded check failed. Aids is really no joke subject, atleast not with people you talk first time to.
and the very instant i saw someone in Ogr with the guild tag "Sapped Girls Can't Say No" i immediately logged out and rushed off to start a date-rape awareness website and charity fund for its victims, just like i'm sure the rest of you all did.
lol, this is awesome. slow down and take a breather. Srsly, bladee... PM a "serious frontpage worthy article" and i'll post it up on the front page just for you, k?
the whole point i'm making is that all this shit can be sidestepped by targeting me in shat, right clicking my unit frame, and choosing inspect. I'm not a superstar by any stretch of the imagination, but stuff like the belt off vashj (2nd best rogue belt in the game, 1st being in sunwell), don't just get handed out to pugs. they don't even get handed out to random guilded rogues. they get given to people who either earned enough DKP in a DKP based guild (time spent on encounters), or to a solid performing rogue that turns up for raids in loot council based guilds.
there's a certain level of gear and enchants and armor kits that say 'hey i'm not a fucking moron'. inspecting can also reveal talent builds. hemo daggers? hmmm... no thanks! we're full on rogues atm, good luck out there.
anything that can be put on the stupid form could be a complete fabrication, and you wouldn't know the guy is a jackass until he wipes the raid 5 times. /ginvite ixobelle shortcuts the essay bullshit out of the loop, and cuts to the chase.
i'm hardly upset that i was rejected... as i said, i ended up in a better guild anyway. the best part was that i said 'your application process, and this whole system in general is pretty fucking retarded' and their butts got all hurt and they cried about it. it was funny to me, so i posted about it on our humor website.
remember when dipshits used to /roll 100 when they'd see a chest in SFK or whatever? that system was stupid. how would you know what to roll on until you saw what was in the chest? say a clothie won, then there was a green plate upgrade for the tank on that run. gee, sorry, i won the roll, you can buy it on the AH? fucking stupid. stupid system, stupid way to go about it, but everyone else does it, SO WE SHOULD TOO.
nazi germany. draw the parallel.
p.s. you're stupid.
rawr.
Well, about the /inspect thingy.. Ofcourse its a possobility but its not them wanting you, but you wanting to join them, why should they run after you then (Then I mean "you" as in general, not only you).
And the enchants.. well, if you have good enchants it only shows you got enough good money and know as much of your class to not buy spell enchants for your warrior.
And GM arnt that retarded that they need 5 raids wiped by one person to understand that he is a moron.
About the rolls.. you rolled for what was in chest, all the white things and rare world drop things to sell. However, if you got item someone else need, and he asks nicely, you should give it.. its a retard check kind of.
p.s. and you like to whine as much as I am stupid :)
meow
(1) Best Isobelle article yet.
(2) Comments are really heating up.
A+
I took a look a their app and it's the same stupid shit we see everywhere. For most of them, you can copy-paste your answer.
"Why you want to join the guild?"
Goddamn, what a shitty question. It's like having a girl asking you if she's fat. You HAVE to lie.
And I have totally agree on that one.. only question I find stupid.. There are 3 options:
1. I know someone there.. then I just say it
2. They are pro, I want epics
3. Its just a random found guild from realm forums..
Obvious, if its not nr1, you wont type nr2 and nr3. So usually you end up at writing some shit like "Omg guys you are so pro, I admire you, I think you got a really nice guild" to some random guild whos name you hear first time.
This article made me laugh so hard... Its obvious you have no idea what you are talking about iso.
I think I stopped reading after "This server have no guild which reached max members" (Which is after good half of the post.. time wasted) Since every experinced player knows that there are only newbee guilds on over crowded server who have reached 500 members.. so maybe 5-10 guilds? So using the words "no guild with 500" members to define servers progress were one of biggest fail I seen so far on front page. Raiding guild with 500 members? Hahahaha
And to be honest, Im going to reveal one thing for you:
The applications are there not to see how good player is, but to filter out players like you who think that pressing confirm link in email is to much for effort from players who really wants to join the guild to help progress and join good community.
Regards.
the "500" point is that it's not like 'oh dude, sorry, we're full' doesn't exist in the game. :/
"
the whole point i'm making is that all this shit can be sidestepped
by targeting me in shat, right clicking my unit frame, and choosing
inspect. I'm not a superstar by any stretch of the imagination, but
stuff like the belt off vashj (2nd best rogue belt in the game, 1st
being in sunwell), don't just get handed out to pugs. they don't even
get handed out to random guilded rogues. they get given to people who
either earned enough DKP in a DKP based guild (time spent on
encounters), or to a solid performing rogue that turns up for raids in
loot council based guilds."
But why are you wearing that belt and not a guild tag? You say this obviously proves you know how to play... well it proves you should know how to play, and you were apparently in a successful guild. But why then are you floating around lookign for a guild? Are you a dick and they kicked you? Are you a loot whore and you pulled a loot and scoot? Did you ninja something and server transfer?
Personally if I'm gonna spend hundreds of hours playing a game with someone, I don't pick those people by just inspecting them, saying 'Hey cool, you got gear, hop on board."
I mean seriously. That's how you think it should work out?
Fucking honestly?
THAT is why WoW sucks shit and has the worst community of any MMO ever. Apparently gear trumps even personality these days.
reposted from about 5 comments up:
3) I was guildless from transferring servers. The old server sucked,
and everyone jumped ship. I did too, but for some reason, the guild i
happened to be in decided they'd rather play alone on an empty server.
Yeah, I think Ixo is the one who is butt hurt here. Nuff said.
PVE sucks. That is all. :D
Great article btw Iso, I <3 the psycho comments.
Quality guilds have applications to filter out retarded scrubs such as yourself.
I think I just might post a link to this "article" in our guild forums to offer up as proof that the system works.
With your attitude?
Glad I'll never be guilded with you.
Yes, Iso is a moron who can't be bothered to spend a millisecond pressing down on a shift key, much less answer a dozen questions from people who will be cooped-up with his stupid illiterate ass in vent for the next year.
Iso, lengthy guild apps are there to filter out people like you. Too stingy and self-centered to take 15 minutes to fill out an app indicates that you'll be a self-centered loot whore in-game too.
Declined. Good luck with your search stupid child.
Iso, man it's been a while. But, alas, our security at work has failed and I can once again grace these boards with my glory. rawr.
Nothing makes me smile more than seeing an entire thread full of QQs. Great work again man.
You just have proven my thory Jynxe, that all stupid people and assholes have fanboys.
... and here i was; this whole time thinking the saying was "opinions are like assholes..."
IMMA JOININ
Poast;
http://aftershock.guildomatic.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=64#64
Screan:
http://forums.notaddicted.com/Gaston/APP.jpg
Its ok Gaston, we all went trough the "cock humor" stage when we were kids.
Funny article Iso. As a past guild leader, I would have more than
likely invited you based on the fact that you had a sense of humor,
whereas a lot of people lie out their ass on apps just to make it into
the guild.
Gaston, I LOL'd hardcore at your app. I can't figure out if Dreadlass
was saying you were rejected, or saying "Nope, no more questions,
you're in!"
I also must say, I find it funny to see the lack of a sense of humor some of the people responding to this article have.
People...IT'S SATIRE! Look it up.
I find it rather funny that you state all 3 of your characters are exalted with kara.
1. Kara isn't hard.
2. Everyone is exalted these days
3. YOU ARE PROUD OF IT
lol fail cunt.
'fully exalted on 3 toons in kara, so i have no interest in ever setting foot in that dump ever again'.
i know you guys get kara server firsts and stuff in your pro ass guild, and i can't take that away from you, but i'll be plenty happy to never zone into kara ever again. ;)
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y199/RogueTink1701-X/Icons/joker-popcor...
Hi mate :)
I see 5 minutes later you applied to Remnants, correctly, and got in.. (http://www.everlastingremnants.com/index.php?topic=28.0)
You learnt a lesson about the application process and the system works?
Good luck and have fun, you're clearly on the road to improvement!
What Iso forgot to post in his screenshot was his lovely app.
Basic jist of it was
Hi i hate you all your all fags and i hate aids givite me you stupid retards. I love ranting on about how awesome i am blah blah blah i have leet gears i am exalted with kara on 6 chars (lol).
I agree apps are kinda silly but it is a useful tool for sifting out idiots like yourself. Why should we take the time to invite and trial you if you can not even spend 5 minutes answering a few questions its more a formality than anything else.
Kind of like introducing yourself to someone you usually tell them your name not kick them in the groin and then expect a favorable response.
If you get this upset about something that is a formality at best. I would hate to see how you would react if you spilled a glass of milk i would assume you would have a mental breakdown and need to be committed to an institution for several years.
We are in noway upset that you "insulted" our system its not even ours we simply rejected your app and moved onto your next one.
I did have a good chuckle at this so i do thank you for that. Whats even more amusing is that you went and made a proper app for remnants. Then claimed you had not gone through the app process but do not worry ill keep it a secret so you can keep your ego intact seeing as it seems quite fragile.
i would have posted it if it hadn't been edited :( would have made the lols 10x better.
I find it rather funny..
So, he made retarded application, got what he deserved (declined) and then makes a normal application to other guild.. erm.. ok.
If you act like a retard, you get threaten like a retard Iso. Hope your new guild will soon find out what a terrible attitude you have.
lol this article is awesome. comments really are half the fun.
for the record, i applied at remnants first (check the dates on the apps), by the time i trolled over to SRSTOWN USA, i was tired of filling out bullshit forms. imagine that. I was even looking for the remnants guy in shat (he was sitting in fron the of the scryer bank afk), when my buddy got me the ginvite to the other guild. whoops!
seriously tho guys, let's let them be. they're busy getting 'server first' kara clears and 'server first' 4/6 SSC. woo! can you even get 'server first SSC 4/6'? i guess so!
http://notaddicted.com/images/isobelle/karaserver1st.gif
SRS BIZNES!
the comments here seem to imply that leaving or being denied entry to video game guilds is a pretty intense, life altering event! i guess between my job, marriage, and baby on the way, i personally take my world of warcraft gameplay time and guild applications so seriously that i
wait
Understandable that you hook up on the words "server firsts of kara" because kara is most important thing for you, if you keep on pointing out about your imba 3 characters exalted with the faction.
Server first is always first,no meter what place. And you can actually see that they are good guild by getting firsts on maggy and outdoor bosses. server firsts 4/6 SSC? Whats strange about that, pull your head outa your ass, and you might be able to read it in this way: Server firsts of 4 bosses in SSC on who they could not be arsed to type names down.
You have some serious problems to understand that what people are saying isn't that you should spend your lifetime writing applications, but stop being an ass and spend 2 min answering 5 questions. See, you could stop being an ass, and answer all questions to other guild, and you got in easy as that.
'You have some serious problems to understand that what people are saying isn't that you should spend your lifetime writing applications, but stop being an ass and spend 2 min answering 5 questions. See, you could stop being an ass, and answer all questions to other guild, and you got in easy as that.'
Satire fools, way to bite.
See, I thought this article was kinda lame, no offense. And not that I don't dislike the mediocre guilds attempting to be professional. It's because I know there are tons of guilds on your server (and every server) that are laid-back and LFM and not total douches, you just aren't looking for them. Guilds like that don't spam trade-chat and realm forums with recruitment posts BECAUSE THEY ARE LAID BACK. The guilds driven by anal-retentive power-hungry dueschs do, because they are anal-retentive and power-hungry. I was going to offer my help by actually researching Dreadmaul to try to find such "laid-back" guilds for you, but then I figured--hey, screw it; he's a big boy, he can do it himself if he really wants. Or if you want to transfer to my server as soon as your cooldown is up in 6 months, I'll be happy to hook you up. Until then, good luck.
Small update here: they changed my post, so everything there is a fabrication, except for the "ring jobs" part.
As if joining a guild in a game is THAT important.
I don't even think Iso was really attempting at joining Aftershock.
OMGZ! SOMEONE'S GOTSTS IT! =p
I agree with you Iso, most apps are lame and a pain in the ass to fill out. That's why we keep ours entertaining and fun. For example:
Recruitment
Cottage Cheese Pirates is now recruiting.
If you want to attempt to apply, please copy and paste the following application and post a new thread on our RECRUITMENT FORUM.
Character name:
Level:
Class:
Previous characters classes and levels:
Age (real life):
Armory link:
Short essay about what the sauce means to you:
RL picture:
Any pets, names and types:
Picture of your pets doing something cute:
Why you want to join Cottage Cheese Pirates:
How you heard about us:
Previous guilds and why you left:
How much gold you have:
How much money you have:
Professions (in game):
Professions (real life):
Would you be willing to quit your job/school and work as slave labor at WhiteCastle to support CCP's WOW addiction:
Favorite porn site:
Favorite non-porn site:
Is your mom a MILF:
How long you can sit in front of your computer without moving:
Do you carry your Vargoth staff with you at all times:
Instances cleared:
Will you 3-way cyber with Cota and Censorethis:
Are you willing to put the F.U. in FUN:
Rumor has it that we MIGHT be recruiting a few people.
Requirements:
Can't be a tool.
Can't be offended by swearing in guild chat.
Must be willing to put the FU in FUN.
Must pass the Trials of the Curds and Sauce.
Must learn many of the important facts about Cottage Cheese.
Must entertain us with your application, or in some other way.
Must send naked pictures to Taurible.
Must have a tabard. Or buy one upon admission.
If you annoy us prepare to be kicked. There will be no discussion about readmitting someone who is kicked for being an annoying jackass.
To be deemed ready to receive the glory of the Sauce, you must prepare.
First, you must accept that the Curds and Sauce are created separately. Indeed.
Second, you must achieve a complete saturation with the Sauce.
Third, you must embrace the Curd in all its forms.
Once it is deemed you have reached these goals, a messenger shall come to you and instruct you on where to go to complete the trials of Curds and Sauce. These trials often include, but are not limited to: consuming large quantities of dairy product, public nudity, tests of strength, tasteful photography, swimming, pinewood derby, first aid, rowing, removal of all body hair, doing our laundry, month of silence, drinking contest, donation of all assets to CCP, driving test, alligator wrestling, sensual massage, naked race, naked dueling, shouting from the rooftops, White Castle Jalepeno Cheeseburger eating contest and written exam.
As long as they follow these simple rules and entertain us, its almost a yes every time.
I like it! lol
Post new comment