NotAddicted

Believe it or not, I am a girl. That might be a little strange to you, MALE, since you’re reading this on the internet, but it’s true that I’m an internet user (now officially a contributor) and get this: I play games too. I’m not talking Freecell or Minesweeper, I play real games. Heard of a little program called Counterstrike, or maybe the computer disc titled World of Warcraft? That’s right, I’m a real gamer. Surprised much? You should be, because next time you question if I’m a girl, I will own you - just like your gender used to legally own mine.

Nothing makes a gamer's stomach turn in knots like a big hot serving of guild in-fighting and drama. At the center of all the trouble are those special players who have a gift for meddling with the guild's social structure. I'm talking about drama queens, of course. They’re in just about every single guild and gaming clan, no matter what game you play.

For those new to WoW*, I am providing a quick getting started guide, primarily geared towards those who want to jump in and start PvPing right away. Here goes.

This update is brought to you by the number three. Three is a magic number, Yes it is, it's a magic number. Somewhere in the ancient, mystic trinity, you get three as a magic number. What makes this number stand out more so than the others? Three is the number of times we crashed the Frostmane server with one solid hour of non stop SPAM.

Orgrimmar: A wasteland of greed, selfishness, and stupidity due to the throne worshipped by every horde member, the auction house. One used to be able to farm Essence of Water and Essence of Air and make enough gold to afford enchants and repairs. Not anymore, Essences are farmed by gold companies and sold incredibly cheap – 4 to 5 gold a pop. And it’s more than just essences, it’s every other popular item on the Auction House. Farming has become so specialized and time consuming players are nearly forced to buy gold – and the moment they get gold, they give it right back to the gold companies because they buy farmed items in the Auction House.

These are the effects that the bourgeois, i.e. the twinks, gold-buyers, and snobby raid-guildies, force onto the rest of us.

The difficulty with World of Warcraft’s PvP system is decay. After a couple months you can climb your way to rank 10, but if you slack off and get a job, watch a few movies with your friends or go out of town on the weekend, you’ll be back to rank 9. To climb the ranks in WoW you have to play constantly. There is no such thing as vacation. There are no holidays, no leniency. The system is more of a hardass than any boss and needier than any girlfriend.

So whats there left to do in WOW after you experience all the end game content, deck yourself out in legendaries, have had your class nerfed to hell and battleground queues suck on your server? You've ranked up in PvP to the top of your server then ranked yourself all the way back down with 1337 dishonorable kills. Whats left? Oh yeah, you can grind reputation! Wait, what if you've done that too? Well.... then theres only one thing left to do..... Be an asshole.

Geeze, whenever I play World of Warcraft it's like I'm always on. People are always waiting for me to say something funny in chat. Like yesterday when I was Ironforge, I just knew that everyone was just waiting for me to make a joke, so I linked my [Breastplate of Valor] in the Trade Channel and said "WTS 5s".